Friday, October 21, 2011

Genetic Narcissism: or the post in which I shamelessly tout my parental vanity

My kids are the most adorable mini humans ever. Seriously. (I am also fully aware of just what an incredibly original concept that is) What parent doesn't think that? Really though, MINE are!  (and so, begrudgingly are yours) I have a sneaking suspicion that it stems from one's own Freudianally suppressed vanity. Apparently you can't stuff things away in the closets of your mind without it eeking out somewhere else. The scientific data are as follows:

1- Obviously I think my husband is one sweet piece of man candy (as one can hopefully assume does everyone else at some point, so as to have agreed to marry them) The glint in his green eyes, his dimples when he grins, overshadowed by his mass of chocolate curls and all brought home with his fit bum and sweet, sweet calves.

fit bum and sweet, sweet calves not shown for your own protection

2- I also think everybody is vain to some extent or another, myself included. How can you escape it in our culture's appearance driven obsession. But seriously people, everybody at one point or another looks in the mirror and thinks "hey, I'm sexy." Sure its not everyday, or even once a year, but you always have the one or two pictures of yourself where you know you had it going on. (probably taken by Tracy) What could exhibit more of your faded youthful charm than your own personal mini me?

only infinitely cuter

3- My children are the equivalent respectively to:  Sohvi - Helen of Troy with her perfect hair and crystal blue eyes. 

Max - Adonis with a sly, ever so slightly mischievous sweetness.  

Lucy - a Reubenesque be-dimpled charm-your-pants-off Botticelli Cherub.  

And my darling Liam, well he's the baby version of Brad Pitt.  Only cuter.  I take the boy in public and teenagers swoon.  Its like anti birth control.  Dusty ovary cocaine.  

A couple of genetically-predisposed-to-be-your-own-brand-of-dusty-ovary-cocaine zygotes (and 9 months) later, you have cuteness (repeated four times and aged to perfection) that reasonably argues to be the very zenith of human evolution.   Makes you get all mushy inside and want to stuff them with goodies and lay down in front of trucks to ensure their safety and smother them with kisses and cuddles.  As you should.  It doesn't take too much wit to discern that this trifecta of scientific fact might not be such a bad idea to ensure the survival of the species.   The Powers That Be are pretty tricky like that.


  1. okay, way waaaay cute. and i'm just glad i can see pictures, since i'm banned from FB.
    it's unarguable how adorable your kids are, they have the coveted blue-eyed blonde look nailed.
    and, i think i could come up with something deeper to say on the topic if it weren't past my bedtime.
    man, your posts are well thought out & well worded! kinda makes me feel like a bimbo/flake!

  2. Eve! you are nothing of the kind! I've been working on this post for quite a while... I need to stop being such a perfectionist..

  3. banned from FB, Eve? What the?

    And that is quite the vocab, C! Impressive!

    And your kids are TOTALLY and ABSOLUTELY beautiful, daring and cute as can be in every respect! I'm with ya! (Plus, I feel the same about my own...)

    Miss you guys soooooooooooooo much!!!! xoxo!!!!!!

  4. OK...obviously I have no life and or spare time---this is the first time I have seen this post and I wanted to say thanks for the shout out! AND its true... you have adorable children with awesome little personalities!